03 May 2007

The two week wait, again

This has been a stressful week. I am still trying to quell the butterflies and stomach churning. It is not good to be stressed right now, I did some yoga to relax yesterday. I wish I could go for a hard run, that would do the trick. But, not supposed to do anything too strenuous right now.

The custody case was settled finally. We now have sole custody of Jackson and we are all very happy about that, Jackson included. The child support payment part didn't go as well as we would have hoped. Unfortunately, the courts are still skewed toward the mother. She did a lot of lying and bullshitting in court to to plead her case. It made me SICK that she just went on and on that she was going to have to move and poor Cassie would have to suffer in all of this due to Jackson's disruption. Like this is even Jackson's fault, the poor kid. It is HER fault, why would she put Cassie in this position? What about Jackson's suffering? Anyway, the child support was cut in half (better than nothing), but Kathy doesn't have to pay us any child support for Jackson. I can't write about this anymore, I really need to put it behind me, it is still stressing me out.

*Sigh* I need a massage!!!!! I don't think I am allowed to get one in the two week wait though, something about making the uterus contract or something.

Okay - so, I didn't tell you about the second IUI we had on Sunday. It went great! 29.8 million little guys and 68% motility. I had major, and I mean MAJOR ovulation pain all day on Sunday, and then it vanished at about 5pm. So, the IUI's were timed well and there were plenty of little guys waiting when my egg or eggs popped out. I really don't know how many eggs were released as they didn't check that at the doc's office. I started up with the progesterone shots on Monday. Yeach.

I had another ultrasound today to measure my ovaries. They just want to see how big they are, if they are under 6cm?, then I need an HCG booster shot. I do need one, so Rudy will give it to me tonight. So, two shots tonight. Egads, I am becoming a pincushion.

I don't know if I mentioned this before, but if I am pregnant, I have to continue taking the progesterone shots until I am 12 weeks pregnant. YUCK! Oh well, it is worth it.

The beta test (blood HCG test) is scheduled for Monday, May 14th. Not sure if I will post the results here or not. Last month, well, actually 2 months ago when I got that negative test it took me a few days to get over it. I feel it may be worse this month if it is negative because injectibles are supposed to have a much higher % of success, especially with the first one. Since it was timed perfectly, I really just don't see how it couldn't work. I know, I am getting my hopes up way too high, there are so many factors involved. I am really worried all the stress I am experiencing this week is going to ruin the whole cycle. So, I guess it could possibly, maybe not work. Isn't that hilarious, I am stressed about being too stressed.

See, I am obsessed. If it is negative, we will probably do another month of this, then maybe move to IVF. Maybe. Don't know right now. It just HAS TO WORK! I can't take much more of this!

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